August 1, 2015

My Barren Womb...


The word tells us that we must be fruitful and multiply (Genesis 1), but what about those who are barren. As people of faith we pray for the barren. A simple prayer of faith that is left in the hands of the one who can open up the most infertile womb and bring forth life.

Let’s look at the mother of many nations. Sara a woman of old age was promised a child. A promise that a woman today would need great faith to even believe is possible. However, in the womb of Sara laid a seed of promise that only God could bring to life.

We look at Leah, a woman that I have come to find of great interest. The word tells us that because she was hated, God opened her womb. While her sister Rachel a woman of great favor and beauty battled with the very curse of infertility. A thing that was in dead thought to be a curse and a thing that caused a woman to be of lesser value.

Next we have Hannah a woman of great persistence. In great travail she prayed her promise into existence to give him back to the priesthood. Her barren womb birthed the very man who shows us the meaning of obedience and faith. The one who shows us what it means when God says to those who has an ear let them hear.

And finally, my favorite barren dual. The famous Elisabeth and Mary the mother of Jesus. Like Sara Elisabeth was a woman of old age who’s doubting husband was made dumb at the very promise of a child. Through Elisabeth we see the birth of the very man who paved the way for the coming of the gospel.

Now that is a lot of impossibility made possible. Situations that didn’t come without the sadness of infertility, worthlessness, and some fear. I find myself intrigued by the idea of the barren womb and that beauty that God put on the very promise of children.

A couple weeks ago now I was praying for God to give me answers to why I was going through the pain that I was going through. From my first diagnoses I knew that this all was for a reason. That there was something that would come from my pain and one day while fishing with my dad it all came. The Lord spoke in a very clearly “your barren womb”.

Instantly I got it, I was so focused on the physical womb and its infertility that I had lost focus on the very promise that kept me. As the song goes, “this life is not my own, to Him I belong, I give myself, I give myself away”. Those words to me are not just words that I love to sing, but prayers of my very heart.

I speak in great humility as I find myself in pain today. My natural womb may be barren, but my spiritual womb is not. The women I spoke of before are all women who birthed great promises that were the vessels that through the power of Jesus Christ changed their world. These women’s very promises came with pain that only infertility can bring and Jesus could use to show the very impossible made possible.

God’s purpose and plan for each one of us is different. As some hold promises of the beautiful opportunity of raising up children to change their worlds. I hold to my promise of mothering the motherless and birthing something that can only be seen through spiritual eyes.

So I say to you today, don’t underestimate the promises of God in your life. The beautiful purpose that you hold in what God wants for you to do. We all have a purpose in this kingdom and all with significant value. There is never anything worth receiving in life that is not worth fighting for. My battle may be different than yours, but both with significant value.

I have to learn to live through chronic pain to be reminded of the very thing that makes me who I am in the kingdom of God. This cross I carry is painful, but that very thing that brings me pain is the very thing that gives me purpose in this heavenly promise.

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