May 1, 2016

Blessed...

I have been recovery from surgery for the last week and during that time have found lots of time to pray and meditate on God. My activity is very limited, but feel blessed by application in my life. And all that has came in this last year.

I have received numerous messages and phone calls from people all over the world praying for me. I find it truly overwhelming to think that I have that many people sincerely praying for me. All the way down to my surgeon who prior to surgery came into the room and asked me if I could pray with him. Yes, you did hear me write my doctor.

I felt humbled by the fact that in an institution that is filled with scientific reasoning and logic. I was given a doctor that believed in the power of prayer. Who knew nothing about my faith or that I even believed in prayer.

It was at that moment that I knew that my continual prayers had been heard. Continual prayers that I would be kingdom minded. Not desiring my own fleshly desires but those that are eternal and God centered. That God's will be my focus and to remember to get my daily substance, so I can be useful in the work of the Lord. To live a life of forgiveness and demonstration of freedom. Praying for God's protection from temptation and evil. And to rely on Jesus' strength and to walk in the spirit, so that in all things I may bring Him glory.


Mat 6:9  After this manner therefore pray ye: Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name.
Mat 6:10  Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven.
Mat 6:11  Give us this day our daily bread.
Mat 6:12  And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.
Mat 6:13  And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil: For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever. Amen.
I have come to realize that when you are in the mist of trials people always seem to worry about you and feel they need to give you encouragement. However, I've learned through this trial in my life that spiritually I am stronger than I have ever been in my walk. Because when I am weak, I am strong (II Cor. 12:10).

I have learned to trust in the miraculous and believe in the supernatural. Seeing as prayers be answered and lives be touched. Learned to listen to the still small voice and pray consistently. I've found hope in the trial and believed steadfastly in the things to come.

This trial may be long, but in the mist of the storm I have found strength. In the darkness, I see light. In the rain, I know the Son.

I feel rich in the things that matter and in the mist of my trial have witnessed God's hand bless. Be blessed readers and know that we serve a God who is able to do exceedingly abundantly more than we could even ask or think (Eph. 3:20).



March 26, 2016

Clear...

I am struggling to put words down as my mind goes a mile a minute about what I should say instead of what I am feeling to write. That unclear message that only God can give you to truly learn how to allow Him to be the stronger voice in your vessel. A voice that only comes when you surrender your will and even though in some anguish lower yourself.

In the mist of my journey I have found myself learning that I rely way to much on speaking the right words or following the right movement. However, in the mist of that I am feeling a prompting to throw away the notes and trust in the guidance of the Holy Ghost. To hear what He is saying and allow myself to be guided by the voice that I want to be walking with. A voice that tells me I can when my flesh tells me I can't.

The Word tells us that when we are weak, He is made strong. I have found this statement to be true as I learn to walk in faith and allow myself to be guided by Him. My body is failing me as I battle through an "incurable" disease, but in that I feel the healing hand of God and trust His blessings will be much bigger than I can even imagine. I say that because in my long journey I have learned that I needed more than a healing from this thorn, but a healing of my heart.

I do not claim the ministry of Paul, but I do claim that if God got Paul through what he endured. God will see me through and I know His promises are real.

My flesh told me how can I minister about a God of healing and miraculous wonder when He won't even heal me. But through that God wanted me to see Him and not what a miracle would do for me.

I recently had a young lady share with me that she had an ultrasound that showed a mass on one of her ovaries. With compassion I told her I would begin to pray. I prayed for God to heal her and to give her hope. I remember being her age and battling with the same disease. A disease that breeds hopelessness as it steals from you fertility.

In the mist of this young woman's pain I still believed that God healed. But how could I pray for God to heal someone when He didn't hear my prayers to heal me of the exact same thing. I told myself that someone else must pray for her because I just must not have enough faith to touch God. But in me was still faith and enough faith to asked God to show me that He still hears my prayers and I prayed for a miraculous healing. And God heard my prayer.

There were no medical treatments that were done from that Monday until she went to see her specialist on Friday. On that day God performed a miracle and what was once a mass the size of a grapefruit was now almost invisible. A certified miracle happened for her and God was the one who touched her body and healed her! She will not need to have surgery and has the hope of one day having children!

God's plans are not our plans and in the mist of my situation I have seen that my blessings are coming in small doses. I have seen the mighty hand of God touch and in the mist of this journey I have seen His strength become mine. I know who my God is and no matter what the trial that seems so unclear in your life... clarity will come in a nice warm package of charity from Jesus!